第153节(2/3)

超人:“不对,从你向上帝发誓开始就错了啊!你们根本是闭着眼睛硬吃cp吧??”

“够了,我们能不能首先跳过环境描写?”红头罩咬牙切齿道,“话说这个场景这么常见的吗?你这又是被谁绑架了,布鲁斯?”

“接下来,让我们完整的看一看:在上一次的重启之中,究竟发生了什么事。”

“……”杰森不禁有些同情的望向了另一个自己,“我劝你还是先做好思想准备。事实上越早自爆越好,你信我,早死早脱身,到时候你才有力气看别人的笑话。”

钢骨:“住口,你这个一晚上打穿了阿卡姆疯人院的蝙蝠侠在说什么胡话。”

红头罩冷嗤:“怎么,随便说几句话都能刺痛你们尊贵的耳朵吗?”

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红头罩在自己嘴巴前面划了一道,拉上拉链,闭紧了嘴。

【超人出现,超人公主抱着布鲁斯·韦恩离开现场,超人对怀里的布鲁斯说:蝙蝠侠你男朋友不会生我的气吧。】

“哦——梦开始的地方,”杰森说,“我就说经典的环境描写能提供足够的记忆点吧?现在谁看到这个场景,还能不立刻想到《十分钟浪漫救援》?”

“那么稍微调整一下,两条真言套索,应该也能串联起我们所有人吧。”戴安娜接上去说。

2

红头罩:“我没想过我还有说这句话的一天——总不能连超级反派都磕蝙布cp吧?”



【这是间废弃厂房,前身可能是制造船舶零件的一个车间……乱七八糟的钢铁脚手架交错躺在地面上,空气里布满了灰尘的味道。】

布鲁斯迎着所有人含义各异的目光,坚强道:“恐惧毒气,恐惧毒气。哎呀,真不愧是我们哥谭的超级反派,确实太难对付了。”

【双面人强硬地检查布鲁斯的瞳孔,怀疑布鲁斯被人下了药。】

超人:“不要用看起来很哲学的话去掩盖一个荒诞的事实!!!”

两位女神对视着,微微一笑:

【绑匪们争吵着《十分钟浪漫救援》早就过时了,什么黑暗英雄救出柔弱总裁之后hurt and fort的p剧情早就不流行了,他们老板现在吃的可是fff小甜文——老板本人适时登场,原来是双面人。】

杰森:“第二个建议,我觉得你们地球的人还是少发表点结论比较好。”

红头罩目瞪口呆。

杰森:“不是,是为了防止你们等一下火辣辣的脸疼。”

【双面人咆哮:“你上次才跟媒体说你跟蝙蝠侠分手了——现在难道又滚到一张床上去了??”】

夜翼拍拍他的肩膀,让他别聊天了赶紧看屏幕:“所有人。我觉得。”

超人看着克拉克。

“?”红头罩转头看着自己的同位体,为观影刚开始就如此劲爆而感到震惊,“你连装都不装一下了?认真的,你在向我们所有人承认你写了布鲁斯和蝙蝠侠的同人文吗?”

克拉克谦虚地说,“磕cp是这样的,有条件就吃,没条件的话创造条件也要硬吃。”

克拉克无辜的回视过去:“那时候我不知道蝙蝠侠的秘密身份是布鲁斯·韦恩,真的,我向上帝发誓。”

p; 两位神奇女侠站在了银屏前。

“我们讨论了一个可能,”神奇女侠说,“既然世界熔炉加上真言套索,能让我们恢复所有重启的记忆。”

【韦恩企业顶楼,布鲁斯先后回复了一连串阔佬留言,其中有很多令人熟悉的名字。】

托尼:“布鲁西!你根本没把我送你的手机带在身上,却骗我说被绑匪搜身带走了!”

红头罩忍不住向自己的兄弟,寻求认同感:“是我疯了,还是地球53的所有人都这么疯?”

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