公爵夫人6- “我是不会成为你的回忆的。”(2/5)

塞菲眼中闪过一丝失望,但他迅速地隐藏起来,点了点头道:“是的,母亲。我会的。”

——

&n

“塞菲……”克劳德的声音微弱而颤抖,他强忍住泪水,勉强挤出一丝微笑,“你……你打扰我休息了,回去吧……”

在塞菲被赶出去的那一晚之后,克劳德在和塞菲的相处中变得更加小心翼翼。每一个动作、每一句话,都仿佛有一层无形的隔阂。他开始刻意地保持距离,生怕自己的情感流露会再次引来萨菲罗斯对孩子的惩罚。每当塞菲靠近,克劳德的心便会紧张地跳动,仿佛随时都会破碎。

着憔悴与痛苦。

看着塞菲的眼泪,克劳德心中如同被刀割般疼痛,他颤巍巍地伸手,想要抚摸塞菲的头,给予他安慰,告诉他这不是他的错,但当克劳德的目光落在站在一旁的萨菲罗斯身上时,那只摇晃的手无力地垂了下来。

最终,萨菲罗斯还是停了下来。离开克劳德时,两人的嘴间牵出了道道淫靡的银丝。他看着克劳德苍白的脸颊和尤显红润的嘴唇,温柔地笑了起来,但是眼神却带着狠戾,他说:“克劳德,我的人偶。你所谓的爱和保护,不过是你自欺欺人的谎言,只不过是在模仿你的母亲,填补你空虚的心而已。”

克劳德看着塞菲慢慢转身离开,内心充满了自责。他知道自己只能通过远离塞菲来保护他,哪怕会深深地伤害他。克劳德的手紧紧地抓住床单,泪水无声地滑落。

在生日后不久,萨菲罗斯将塞菲召唤进书房,让他准备第二天离开领地,前往帝都的学院参加入学仪式。

克劳德心里一抽,一阵地酸涩,但他知道自己不能表现出来,因为萨菲罗斯还在这里。他抬起头,勉强挤出一点笑容,而漂亮的蓝眼睛蒙上了一层雾:“你继续努力吧。”

塞菲将母亲的冷漠是做自己不够努力的结果。他更加刻苦地学习,参加更严酷的训练,试图用优秀的成绩来赢得母亲的认可。希望有一天能再次让母亲笑着夸奖他。然而这一切的努力,只让塞菲和克劳德之间的距离越来越远。

塞菲也察觉到了这种变化。他发现自己只有在父亲在场的情况下,才能见到母亲,而每次见面时,他的母亲都会表现地十分冷漠,和以前温柔的样子大相径庭,仿佛不再关心他。塞菲的内心充满了困惑和痛苦,但他认为是自己的做的还不够好,不够让母亲满意,所以母亲才不再夸奖他同他微笑。

每次这样的互动,都让克劳德心如刀割。他知道自己的冷漠正在伤害塞菲,但为了保护他,他却只能这样做。每当塞菲走远,他便会在萨菲罗斯不屑的哼笑中独自流泪。

“母亲……”塞菲哽咽地说道,泪水再次涌上眼眶,“对不起,都是我的错。”

萨菲罗斯的吻越来越热烈,仿佛要吞噬掉克劳德的所有意志。克劳德很快就感到了呼吸困难,胸口剧烈地起伏,几近窒息。他试图推开萨菲罗斯,但他的力量在萨菲罗斯面前显得如此微不足道。克劳德的手无力地停在萨菲罗斯的胸口,任由他的霸道地索取。

萨菲罗斯看着塞菲失落地离去,勾起一抹讥讽的笑意:“你看,这就是你所谓的母爱。虚弱、无力,只会让人感到更加痛苦。”

萨菲罗斯的说出的每一个字都刺痛了克劳德,他深知自己的无力,却找不到任何可以改变现况的方法。他索性闭上眼睛,不再去看萨菲罗斯,但心中默默祈祷,希望有一天能够找到解脱的方法,让塞菲和自己都能摆脱萨菲罗斯带来的黑暗。

塞菲无法理解母亲为什么会这么说,露出了惊讶和悲哀的神情,但他看到他母亲虚弱不堪的样子,他点点头,抹去眼角的泪水,强忍着难过:“好的母亲,我先走了。”

克劳德愤怒地瞪着萨菲罗斯,但是他的眼神却脆弱易碎,丝毫没有威慑力。萨菲罗斯缓缓走向克劳德,俯下身,轻轻吻了克劳德的额头,接着是脸颊,最后是嘴唇。克劳德无奈又绝望地接受了这个亲吻。

塞菲有些讶异,没有想到父亲会提出这个要求,他疑惑地看着萨菲罗斯:“明天吗?”

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一次,塞菲在父亲的注视下,谨慎地走向克劳德,想要和他说几句话。但克劳德低着头看书,目光冷淡,仿佛根本不在意他的存在。塞菲深吸一口气,声音有些颤抖:“母亲,我……我最近学习了新的剑术,老师夸我有天分。而且我的历史和文法又获得了满分……”他的声音卑微,充满了渴望,“母亲,您能夸夸我吗?”

塞菲十五岁时,长得和萨菲罗斯愈发相像,虽然脸上还带着稚嫩,但已经有了超过同龄人的沉稳和威严。城堡的仆人们和领地的民众都在为有这样一个出色的少公爵而开心。

塞菲越来越优秀,但是克劳德却只能用疏远来保护他,于是在心中更加地自责。而塞菲则在孤独中不断成长。他们之间的隔阂变得更深,更加难以逾越。

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